Kaishuu Inc
by Le Random Lady-Person
Summary: Hiei has an oven? (No) And it needs to be fixed? (No) Well, Mana and Angel are ready to help! (To screw things up, actually...)


Kaishuu Inc.

Disclaimer: I don't own the fictional characters in this fic, except for Mana and Angel, who own themselves and aren't all that fictional.

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Day one: Hiei's oven

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It was a perfectly cool cloudy day and Hiei was perched on a branch placed midway up on his tree. He was enjoying the serene surroundings, ever so often opening an eye at the rustling of the underbrush surrounding his tree, which usually turned out to be a bird or rabbit.

There was a sudden outburst of crinkling and crackling as two rather large figures tumbled from a bush just below the tree.

Hiei sat up straight and peered down, expecting to see a couple deer, or perhaps a pair of wild dogs. But that's not what he saw. It wasn't even close.

As Hiei watched curiously, two girls stood up, looked around sheepishly, and then brushed the leaves from their black suits.

Hoping they hadn't noticed him, Hiei prepared to flit away to avoid what he expected would be a fangirl disaster if they got a hold of him.

"Hiei! Oi Hiei! Hello Hiei! Taco!"

Hiei froze.

"Wha'da ya mean taco?"

Hiei looked down again.

The slightly shorter girl with long black hair and neatly button suit jacket was now scolding the girl with short blonde hair and sloppily unbuttoned suit jacket, who had apparently been the one who had called out to him.

When the black-haired girl noticed Hiei was staring at them with a look of bewilderment on his face, she turned and began an explanation.

"Hello Hiei! We're Kaishuu Inc. and we've come to help you! Please excuse her, she's crazy," she said, pointing to the blonde-haired girl. "I'm Angel, and this is Mana."

I wanted to say who we are! And I can say my own name thank you very much!" Mana proclaimed, pouting. "…And I'm not crazy! He is!" She pointed to a tree placed a few feet away. "Yep, him!"

Hiei face faulted. At least the girl named Angel seemed to be sane. But what did he need help with? Nothing.

"Leave. I need no help from the likes of you." He scowled.

Mana scowled back. "Yes huh! You need help with your oven, I know cause I'm psycho!"

Angel sweatdropped. "Psst, you mean psychic!"

Mana blinked. "Oh yeah. But he still needs help!"

Hiei and Angel stared as Mana dived at the tree trunk and began gnawing on it.

"You better come down from there before she hurts herself," Angel said as she began to try and pry Mana from the defenseless tree.

Hiei thought for a moment, and then deciding he didn't want his tree to be a chew-toy for the odd girl, he hopped to the ground but was still careful to keep his distance.

As soon as Hiei's feet touched the ground, Mana stopped her attack on the tree and turned to him. "Now we can begin with the fixing of the oven!"

Hiei titled his head to the side slightly. "Oven?"

Mana pulled a book from thin air and began flipping through the pages, muttering to herself as she did so.

Hiei watched patiently.

After a minute or so, Mana shoved the open book into Hiei's hands and proclaimed, "THIS is an oven."

Hiei looked at the picture the book provided and read the short description next to it. "I don't have one of these, and I don't need one either."

Mana blinked. "But you have to have an oven! Why would our agenda say 'fix Hiei's oven' if you didn't?" She held up another book.

Hiei read the line of text that was scrawled along the top of the page. "…That says 'paint the Pentagon yellow and green with an enchilada.' What the hell is wrong with you?"

Mana blinked again. "I'm perfectly fine."

"And I'm the king of Siberia."

Mana bowed. "Your highness."

Angel stared at Hiei. "How do you know about Siberia?"

Hiei stared back. "I… guessed."

Angel sweatdropped.

Hiei looked around nervously. "Well, I did…"

Mana tugged on a lock of his hair. "Uh-huh, and purple chipmunks fly their golden toasters from your hair at noon!"

Hiei stared.

Mana looked around quickly. "I know what you're hiding!"

Hiei continued to stare and Angel shook her head disapprovingly.

Mana coughed. "Look in his pocket!" Another cough.

Angel shrugged and began to dig through Hiei's pocket.

Hiei growled. "Get your hand out of my- Youko?"

Angel blinked and Mana stared. "Your pocket's name is Youko?"

Hiei shook his head. "No." He pointed to a tree a few yards away. "Youko."

Both girls turned and, sure enough, Youko Kurama was determinedly climbing a pine tree.

Angel ran over to the tree. "Youko! Get down!"

Youko stopped climbing, looked at Angel, and then began dancing on a tree branch.

Not seconds later, he fell from the branch and landed flat on his back.

Mana held up a poster reading '8.'

Hiei sweatdropped.

Mana shoved a poster in Hiei's hands that read '0.'

Hiei blinked. "Wha…" He started, but was cut off by a quick blow to the head with a… turtle.

Youko glared. "I busted my ass, literally I might add, falling out of that tree and all you gave me was a zero? The nerve!"

Mana giggled and Angel stared as Youko stomped off in the distance and over a cliff.

Hiei sat up and threw the turtle into a nearby tree.

Mana smacked him. "That's the leader of the Peanut Mafia you're harassing! I refuse to help him!"

Angel nodded and picked up the turtle. "Someone who harasses the leader of the Peanut Mafia deserves no help! Let's go!"

Hiei stood up and watched as the two odd girls and the turtle made their way out of the woods.

"Well, today couldn't possibly get any weirder…" He muttered as he took his place on his tree branch once again.

But just then, he was showered with little peanuts wearing pimp hats…

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-cough- First chapter down. Next chapter: Shido's toaster.


End file.
